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Rabbi's Blog

Take off your mask

Friday, February 26, 2010 - 4:03 PM

Take off your mask

On Purim it is customary to dress up and wear masks. There are various reasons given for this custom; the miracle was hidden in nature, many non-Jews got so sacred that they dressed up like Jews, it adds to the celebration.

If we go a little deeper into the story we might find another very relevant answer. In the story of Purim the question of Jewish identity plays a major role. For the first time in Jewish history the Jews were without a Temple, for the first time in almost 1000 years most Jewish people were exiled from the land of Israel, many of the prophecies seemed to not be materializing, many Jews were demoralized and questioning the future of the Jewish people.

Many Jewish people questioned their own identity should we remain faithful to our tradition or should we just give it up.

Are we defined by a land, the Temple, is that who we are. Are we defined by our circumstances or is there a deeper truth inside of us?

This was the challenge facing the Jews back then as well as us today. Who am I ? What is the truest part of me? Am I defined by the times we live in, am I defined by my thoughts, beliefs, circumstances? Or is there something deeper.

In the story of Purim many Jewish people began to assume new identities in preparation for an uncertain future, and began to mask and hide their Jewish identity. That all came to a screeching halt when Haman rose to power and wrote the worst decree in Jewish history, the total annihilation of the Jews. A most unexpected thing happened, the mask came off and the Jewish people felt and identified with being Jewish like never before. They even felt more Jewish then they did while they were living in Israel, they connected more with their Jewish identity then when the Temple stood, they experienced such an intensity of the truth of who they really were even greater then how they felt at the giving of the Torah at Mount Sinai.

They recognized that when you remove all the masks you discover that at our core we are Jewish, “A Jew is a Jew is a Jew”. And that no matter where we are and no matter what the circumstance, regardless of our level of observance, knowledge, belief or practice, that is who we are. We are all one and we share the same Jewish soul.

This is the recurring theme of Purim, every year we come to face to face with this same discovery. A discovery of who we really are and what hides behind the masks we wear all year round.

And that is why there is a custom to wear masks on Purim, signifying that we are all wearing masks all the time, the problem is we think that it’s not a mask we think that ‘s who we really are, we forget that it is just a mask. On Purim we put on a mask to remind ourselves that beneath the mask is our true self, our Jewish self.

So this year when you get dressed up for Purim remember that it is only a costume, it is only a mask and that after Purim you are going to remove it, and just like the mask and costume isn’t the real you so to the “masks” we wear all year round are not the real you. So take off all your masks and just be yourself. And experience the story of Purim like you never did before.

Shabbat Shalom and a Very Happy and Un-Masked Purim

Rabbi Zalman Marcus

Is Wealth a Virtue?

Friday, February 19, 2010 - 10:33 PM

Is Wealth a Virtue?

Is being wealthy something to strive for? Is wealth a necessary evil? Should we be satisfied with whatever we have or should we strive for wealth?

For many wealth is a dream or a song, “If I were a rich man…”, but is it a virtue. Is it something we should all strive for?

This weeks Torah portion, Terumah begins with the building of the Tabernacle, the mobile Temple the Jews built in the dessert. The Torah describes G-d’s instructions to Moses, “Go to the children of Israel and ask them to donate gold, silver and copper ...”.

Why does the Torah begin with gold, most people don’t have enough gold to be able to give it away to the Temple, most people have more copper than silver and more silver than gold. So why does the Torah begin with Gold? The people back then were obviously rich, and gold was no big deal to them, and that is why the Torah begins with gold.

Everything in the Torah has an eternal message. What then is the Torah’s message for us in 2010? The Torah is telling us that wealth is a virtue and that each one of us should strive to be wealthy.

In what way is wealth a virtue? Obviously not in having the wealth itself, but rather what we can do with the wealth. Namely: 1. To be able to give more charity. 2. To be able to observe the mitzvot with peace of mind and magnanimously.

When we are clear as to what we need wealth for and we reflect on how G-d ultimately is the one who provides us with our wealth, this keeps us from falling into the vice of wealth.

Wealth is not just limited to money it also includes our talents. When G-d blesses us with talents and gifts we need to maximize their use and benefit so that they have the greatest impact on the world around us.

So should you be happy with your lot? When it comes to satisfying your personal needs that is a great attitude and will bring you happiness, but when it comes to utilizing the wealth, talents or gifts to fulfill G-d’s purpose for giving them to you, then that is not a good attitude. Instead we should strive harder and achieve more.

A rabbi was once traveling with his large family in a brand new mini van, after parking the car at a grocery store a woman came over and commented, “Wow you are so wealthy!”, he quickly defended himself by saying that the van was simply leased and that he had gotten a really good deal on it. To which the woman responded, “I was not referring to your van I was referring to your children”. Family is also a gift from G-d and is another form of wealth.

This month of Adar is a special month for us Jewish people. May this month bring you much success in all your wealth endeavors.

Shabbat Shalom

Rabbi Zalman Marcus

P.s. On March 11, CJC will be hosting the first JBC Jewish Business Connections meeting. This will be a great opportunity to increase your wealth on many levels. This is open to all so let your friends and associates know about this.

Have You Been Seen Lately?

Friday, February 12, 2010 - 3:05 PM

Have you been seen lately?

Have you ever experienced the feeling of not being seen? It could have been a parent, a sibling, school mates, a teacher, a co-worker or a boss. Is there something you are doing today to compensate for not being seen as a child or a young adult?

Many adults today are still looking to be seen, whether it is from their family or from their peers or even strangers. The reason behind their search is because they felt at some point that they were not seen. This is very often the case with teenagers and why it is that they act out. For many teens it is because they feel that they are not seen or understood. No one is listening to them, especially their parents. Many teens have expressed that their greatest desire from their parents is that they should sped more time with them.

If you ever experienced something like this you know exactly what I am talking about. You may have been on the playground in school and been bullied and when you told your parents about it they just blew it off. They did not hear you. Or you needed some attention from your parents and they seemed to not see you or hear you.

These kinds of experiences can affect the person in a dramatic way. They can become obsessed with themselves to the point where they can no longer see anyone else and therefore continue the cycle or they can become some of the most sensitive people in the world and make sure to see and hear everyone in their lives.

Now seeing your children does not mean giving them what they want. Actually the opposite is true when we give our children no or little structure it is a subtle message of not seeing or hearing them as well. Our children crave structure. Seeing your child means caring for them and being present when they need you. Disciplining them and giving them structure.

In the Torah we are told that if you reflect on 3 things you will stay away from sin, “know that which is above you; an eye that sees, an ear that hears and that everything you do is recorded”.

At first glance this is simply a deterrent for sinning. If you know you are being watched you are not going to sin, simple as that. But I think there is a much deeper lesson here. You should always know that G-d sees you and hears you and cares about what you do. Even if you feel that some of the people in your life have not seen you or heard you, G-d always does. When I feel seen and heard that inspires me to want to do good and be there for others, for G-d and for the world, when I don’t feel seen or heard, then I tend to do things I shouldn’t.

At Mount Sinai it was time for us to see G-d and to experience being seen by G-d, we are told that every Jewish soul was there. Even today in 2010 deep in our soul is the experience of being seen by G-d.

During the times of the Temple, all Jews would travel to the Temple 3 times a year for the pilgrimage festivals. In describing the experience the Torah says, “To see and to be seen”. Going to the Temple was a glimmer of the Mount Sinai experience. Today that we don’t have the holy Temple, studying the Torah and spending time with the righteous are the methods we can use to experience that today.

Just as G-d sees and hears us, it is our duty to make sure the people in our lives are seen and heard. So if you are still feeling unseen or unheard; 1. Remember that G-d always sees and hears you. 2. Do your best to see and hear others.

May we merit the time when we are told that “Your eyes will behold your Teacher (G-d)”, when we will truly see and be seen, with the coming of Moshiach speedily in our days.

Shabbat Shalom

Rabbi Zalman Marcus

Who Needs Fame?

Friday, February 5, 2010 - 3:04 PM

Who Needs Fame?

Do you want to be famous? Did you ever want to be famous? Why is it that so many young people need to be famous? Today with facebook and Twitter we have a new phenomenon called “micro-fame”, you have your “followers” and your “friends”. Why are we so intrigued by the lives of the famous?

For many it a search for significance, to be “discovered” to feel noticed. If I have a lot of “friends” or “followers” then I am somewhat significant. So we follow the famous hoping that somehow it will rub off on us.

Maybe you don’t need this kind of fame but you may need to be noticed by your peers, parents, teachers etc.

This may be why as people get older they tend to get depressed because they are not as productive and therefore have not as much to contribute and therefore don’t feel significant.

What does the Torah say about this internal struggle? You are created in the image of G-d; G-d thinks you are significant and that you play a significant and unique role in the cosmic divine plan. You have fame; G-d has noticed you, what other fame can come close to that.

The Rebbe for years would spend most of each Sunday receiving thousands of visitors, handing each one a dollar and giving them a blessing. One day an elderly woman came by and said, “Rebbe how is it that you don’t tire?” the Rebbe answered, “When you are counting diamonds you don’t ever get tired.”

Each of us is a diamond. Our inner value and worth should come from deep inside of us not from the people around us.

This weekend is the yartzeit of Rebbetzin Chaya Mushka Schneerson’s (this year marks the 22 anniversary of her passing). Together with her husband, the Rebbe, she selflessly served the Jewish community for practically all of her life. The Rebbetzin did not want any recognition or special treatment and wanted no fame whatsoever. To the extent that if she would go to a store and was recognized and given preferential treatment she would not go back to that store again.

She did not need external recognition to make her feel significant; she got her sense of significance from the fact that she was a diamond of G-d.

It was for this reason that she was able to be so kind and generous to all. You see when you feel like a diamond of G-d, then you realize that every person around you is a diamond as well. If you look at others and you don’t see a diamond it is probably because you don’t see yourself as a diamond. If you think you treat others like diamonds but you don’t feel yourself to be a diamond then you are probably not seeing them as diamonds either.

The Rebbe and Rebbetzin and so many of our great Jewish leaders truly felt that they were diamonds of G-d and that was what gave their life meaning and purpose and that is where they got their worth and significance. And that was what allowed them to then see everyone around them as diamonds and therefore treat them as such.

This Shabbat on her yartzeit is the time for each one of us to connect with our inner diamond and then be able to view all those around us as diamonds as well.

An amazing way to actualize this is to light the Shabbat candles tonight and every Friday evening before sundown and see the diamond shape flame as a reflection of your inner diamond and the inner diamond of everyone around you.

Shabbat Shalom

Rabbi Zalman Marcus

P.s. This weekend is the Chabad Shluchot (Chabad Womens Leadership) Convention, it is always scheduled to coincide with the Rebbetzins yartzeit. I want to take this opportunity to wish Bassie and Rochel much success and a safe trip together with the other 2500 Shluchot from around the world who have gathered in New York for an energizing and inspiring convention.

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